Not worth it
by Spokenvoice
Summary: SNICKERS Sara and Nick are going out together, yet none of the team know. How will their relationship last? After an incident in the lab indangering the Saftey of the CSIs, Sara asks herself is any of it worth fighting for?
1. Chapter 1

**Not Worth it**

_(11th January 2006)_

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- _

**Summary** - **_SNICKERS_ **Sara and Nick are going out together, yet none of the team know. How will their relationship last? After an incident in the lab indangering the Saftey of the CSIs, Sara asks herself - is any of it worth fighting for?  
**Pairing **SNICKERS  
**Rating **- T _(language and content)_

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_Never wrote Sara Nick as a couple, so first time for everything. Here's my shot at it - hope you like _

**Part 1**

"Grissom wants you to be in there in about ten, got it guys?" Warrick called into the locker room from the door way, where two of the team where getting changed.

"I'll be out in Five Rick so get the coffee on" Nick smiled back as he began to change.

"I already got Catherine on it" Warrick smiled, "Fresh pot coming up" he explained and then walked away from the doorway letting it slam shut.

"Must be a big case tonight" Sara spoke as she reached into her locker and took her gun placing it into the holster strapped to the side of her waist. Then she looked over to Nick as she placed her bomber jacket on. "I got $20 saying we work a double"

"You're on" Nick smiled, as he finished buttoning up his dark blue shirt leaving the top two open and then placing his own gun into his holster, off the side. As he did this he shot Sara the famous, and more than charming 'Stokes smile' before shutting his locker closed, "I'll see you out there then". Turning he went to walk towards the exit of the room which Warrick had moments before been standing in, he only made it to the doorway and as his hand pressed against the doorknob he was stopped by Sara's voice.

"Hold up. What's the rush Nicky?" She smirked as she shut her own locker and turned to face him – "We got ten minuets"

Nick nodded his head in agreement, "Yeah we do, but we also got a lab full of people on the other side of this door."

Sara walked towards him, a smile slapped on her face, she placed a hand on his chest and he moved his down taking hold of her waist, "Did I ever tell you, I like to live dangerously?" She asked. Moving forward slightly their lips met, his hands tightening the grip on her waist as he lent back against the door, their embrace becoming more passion fueled by the moment. His hand moved under her jacket and shirt, his fingers lightly grazing her soft skin.

"Mm, is that so?" He murmured against her lips, drawing back for a breath.

"That's so" She nodded. Smiling and moving into him further – their lips locking again.

---------------

"Hey nice of you to join us" Catherine smiled from where she was sat in break room, "Where's Sara?"

"She'll be in here in a minuet…just got a call" he explained, "She won't be long" Nick walked over to the coffee machine to pour himself a mug. Catherine was sat at the table along with Warrick – each with their own coffee.

"So, how was your night off?" Catherine asked Nick.

"It was okay! Did I miss anything here?" he answered her question with a question, something which he had become more than skilled at over the past few weeks while dating Sara. None of them knew, and for now that's how they wanted it to stay.

"Not much with me, DB on the strip but Sara - she had a bad case last night." She explained.

Nick had his back to the rest of them pouring his coffee so they luckily couldn't see his facial expression. If they could have then they would have noticed the worried, confused look. When Sara had shown up at his that morning she had told him everything was fine. "What do you mean?"

"What do we mean, it was a domestic abuse case… that's what we mean" Warrick answered for Catherine. Nick wanted to ask more questions but couldn't knowing that it would look to conspicuous. Plus, the words SARA in the same sentence as DOMESTIC ABUSE meant the same thing to him as it did the rest of them – trouble.

Nick left it at that walking over to the table and took a seat next to Warrick and across from Catherine, before any of them could say anything more Sara walked in. "Hey guys" She greeted, taking the much trodden path to the coffee pot.

"Hey Girl" Warrick smiled, "Coffee's fresh"

"Yeah, thanks Catherine" Sara smiled, as she reached for it.

"Don't mention it. So I hared you closed the case…" The blond offered.

Sara stopped pouring the coffee and then looked up at the wall in front of her, her back to them she hesitantly answered. "Err, yeah…I did" turning slowly she was sure to put the cup to her mouth and letting the piping hot coffee enter her as she looked over to Catherine leaning on the counter top readying herself for more questions.

"So who was it in the end?" surprisingly it was Warrick who asked this, Sara looked to the guy who she considered a brother – and who could sure piss her off like one – she offered him a calm reply, "Try the boyfriend, not that I doubted" She explained, "DNA match, her blood on his shirt – he beat her to death after coming home drunk" They could all tell that she was thinking intently about the case and knowing Sara she was probably beating herself up over it – "Bastard got 1st degree – he murdered her in cold blood" she looked up and locked eyes with Catherine, "She was 3 months gone as well"

"Pregnant?" Catherine asked, "Shit" She cursed.

"Yeah" Sara nodded her head, and then looked to the floor, her mind reeling through the image. The victim was bludgeoned to death with a blunt object…her skull crushed and shattered.

"Well you got him Sara… you got a conviction…he'll pay for what he did" Catherine offered – it was the only comfort that was available to Sara.

Nick sat watching his, Girlfriend; it was still funny thinking that Sara was his girl. She was so angry, yet hurt…he could see that in her eyes. And now with the way she was avoiding eye contact with anyone he knew that she was pissed off. He wanted her to look up so he could at least offer her a comforting smile but she wouldn't. It took him all his will power not to stand up and walk over to her – comfort her, hold her. Instead he looked back to his coffee and even though the conversation continues to flow from subject to subject all that he could think about was Sara, and would be until they got out of the lab and he'd be able to make sure she was really okay.

"So it's Lindsey's big day tomorrow huh?" Warrick asked,

Catherine gave him a nod, "Yeah and please tell me you guys are still coming to the party?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world Girl" Warrick reassured.

"Yeah, I'll be there"

"Cont on it…have we ever let you down?" Nick questioned.

"Count on what?" Grissom asked as he walked into the Break room only to have four of them turn and look at him.

"On these guys going to Lindsey's party tomorrow" Catherine answered "You still coming Gris?"

"Well I got a court case in the morning but I'll be there." She seemed happy with this and smiled, "Great, Fresh coffee if you want"

"Thanks"

"So what you got for us tonight?" Warrick asked Grissom,

"Not much happening tonight…it's slow out there… Catherine, Warrick - I got you a car collision on the strip. Two Cars involved and three dead…this sounds to be anything but an accident but let the…"

"…evidence do the talking. We got it" He smirked.

"Cute" Grissom shot at Warrick.

"Sara, Nick…nothing as of yet…I'll find you if anything comes up" Grissom explained, "And Sara, I need a word" Sara didn't even argue, she just nodded her head – "My office" he looked to the rest of the team, "Keep me posted" with this he left.

"I'll see you when we get back" Warrick offered to the room.

"Yeah…if I still got a job" she mumbled following Grissom from the break room.

Each of the remaining three looked confused at this statement.

---------TBC


	2. Chapter 2

_thankyou so much for your reviews, they mean alot to me. So i gave you guys an extra long part to show my thanks. Ur the best ;)__ hope you like _

**Part 2**

He had been walking around the paper work for days, and it may even stretch to weeks now – hoping beyond all hope that it would disappear, but who was he kidding. So maybe it been a slow night tonight was a good thing, he'd be able to get some over due reports and what not into Grissom. But now as he sat in the silence at his desk he couldn't concentrate- all that he could think about was Sara. He didn't understand why she didn't tell him what had happened last night? Why would she hide it from him? He tapped his pencil onto the paper, the more he thought, the more he worried.

He didn't know how long she had been in with Grissom, maybe half hour now…

He stood up, throwing his chair back, "Sara?" He called seeing her walking down the corridor. "Hey, Sara?" he jogged up to her as she blatantly ignored him. So he took her arm and forced her to stop. "What's happened?" he asked.

"Nothing, just…" She pulled her arm free and shook her head.

"Is everything okay?" He asked, "I mean what was all that about"

"Nothing, can we leave it?" She shot. He looked into her eyes she could see his concern – she was actually glad that they were here, in the lab because he couldn't force her to speak. "Look I have to go see Greg… I'll talk to you later"

"Will you talk to me tough?" he asked, she turned her back and she just walked away; he watched her go wishing she wasn't so stubborn. He growled in frustration.

--------------

"Hey Greg" She stood in the doorway looking at him sat in the lab, his CD player drumming out a rhythm- Sara waved her hand to get his attention. As soon as he did catch sight of her he swung his chair around and faced her – turning off the music.

"Hey Sara, couldn't spend one night away from me I see" He smirked.

Sara rolled her eyes, "You wish Greg…" She stooped for a moment, then her tone became more serious "look, last night…"

Greg stood up, "Forgotten all about it" he explained.

"No…wait…I want to tell you"

"You don't have to apologies Sara…"

"No I do. I shouldn't have gone off like I did at you…your doing your job! I was out of order."

Greg listened to her apology, and then smiled softly – "I appreciate that…but it isn't necessary" he walked forward so that they were closer just incase anyone was around. "Look, are you okay now?" he asked.

"I'm here, not suspended, and apologized to you – I'm feeling a little better" She explained. "So, we okay now?"

"We were always okay, hell it'll take more than you having ago for us not to be" He explained, "You could always go to breakfast with me to make up" He attempted.

"Yeah see, Greggo, my Boyfriend may not like the idea of that" She explained with a smile.

"Yeah, well I don't see him around here…he'll never know." Greg continued the playful banter – letting Sara know that things really were back to normal – "you know you can't keep your hand off me. For example last night"

"Greg, last night I grabbed you around the collar and pinned you against the wall for getting a little to close to me…" She explained with a small smile, "Doesn't really say 'love' does it?"

He smiled, "Well, I hope he's worth it"

Sara just smiled, "Yeah…well…I hope he is to - I'll let you get back to work"

She turned but Greg called to her, "Hey Sara, remember if you want me to…well tease you anytime soon - my doors always open"

In Greg's strange way Sara knew what that meant, he was a friend and he was always around to listen to her moan. "Thanks Greg… means a lot"

He nodded and smiled before she left heading towards the locker room.

---

Standing against her closed locker she had her head rested on the cool metal, her eyes closed as she thought about last night. Things had gone from bad to worse right from the beginning. And she had blown up at anyone who got in her way.

She must have been like this for a few minuets, she was so captured by her memories that she didn't notice someone walk in and then, walk over to her. The one thing she did feel that brought her from her thoughts were when two strong arms wrapped around her waist pulling her back into him. "Nick … what-" She began but was cut off.

"I like to live dangerously" he murmured softly into her ear as he began softly kiss her neck. She sighed; the feeling of him so close was the only thing lately that managed to calm her.

"Someone might walk in" She spoke regretfully as she closed her eyes and turned herself in his embrace, his hands making there was to his lovers back and once again moving under her shirt, she moved her hand around his neck and brought him into a passionate kiss. He moved her back pressing her against the locker – "What's this for?" She mumbled into his lips.

He lent back, "I want you to know I care about you Sara" He explained. "Please talk to me?"

Sara lent against the locker looking up at him, she moved her hands to his shoulder making sure he couldn't close into her again, "Oh I see what this is…bribery huh?" She asked, smiling.

"Is it working?"

"Maybe" She nodded, she sighed and lent against into his chest. He wrapped his arms around her, "I'm not used to been with anyone who gives a damn Nick… this is new to me"

"Well, get used to it Sidle." He moved his hand further up her back, Causing her to sigh, he moved them back down taking hold of her waist and pulling her into him, "because I give a damn"

"Can I just have a little time" She asked, wishing silently they weren't in the locker room but at her apartment. Alone.

"All the time you like hun" he nodded.

She smiled and looked up at him, "Thank you"

-------------------

Sara was sat in the break room, having just caught up with all of her paper work from a weeks worth of cases she decided that she needed a drink. It really was a slow night in Vegas tonight as she hadn't been called out at all. Grissom got a call, and gave it to Nick as a solo case. Truth was she was happy to let him have it, for the first time been alone, and having time had proved useful.

"Hey you"

Sara looked up to see Grissom walking in, "Hey Gris"

"You okay?" he asked,

"Much better…" She nodded, "I finished up the reports you needed. I put them on your desk"

"Thanks." He moved and poured himself a mug of coffee. Then turned to look at Sara, walking over he took a seat at the table in front of her. So how about you tell me what has got you so happy?"

"Happy?" She was confused, okay she wasn't pissed, but she wasn't happy.

"Well yeah, I mean…you usually argue me into the ground when I keep you off the cases" He explained.

"Yeah well, let's just say after last night…I needed this." She looked up and locked eyes with him, "Thanks for you know…not suspending me"

"Hey, this place couldn't run without you…we all know that" he joked, taking her hand for support - She laughed, "Look after yourself Sara"

She just nodded her head.

Grissom nodded as well then looked at his watch, "Well, I better get back."

"Yeah…I should finish up my lose ends" She explained.

-------------------

"Shift over?" Sara asked Nick,

"Yeah, my case has frozen till tomorrow…" He explained, as he pulled his locker open. She just nodded her head. Before either of them could say anything else both Catherine and Warrick walked into the locker room.

"Hey you two" Warrick greeted,

"Hey Guys" Sara offered, "How'd the case go."

"Signed, sealed and almost delivered" Catherine explained, "We just need to get it on Grissom's Desk and we are done"

"Well, Sidle looks like you lost 20"

Sara looked from her locker to a smiling Nick, "Small price to pay for an early shift" She explained with a shrug and a smile, she reached into her jeans and took from it a 20 dollar bill. Reaching over she handed it to his waiting hand. As there fingers met the two felt their hearts begin to flutter. Both couldn't understand how Catherine and Warrick weren't picking up on how they were acting, the eye contact, and the occasional brush of hands -which they both drew out. 'Blind to the obvious' – Sara had diagnosed.

"What you know… Sidle lost yet another bet" Warrick joked.

Sara slugged him in the arm and gave him a warning look.

"Hey what's this about?" Catherine asked shutting up her locker having got her jacket and leaning against it to watch the scene play out. Okay, she wasn't oblivious to everything – Sara corrected – but when she used the 'Sidle Glare' they all usually picked up on it and knew not to mess with her when she used it.

"Nothing" Sara shot, looking at Warrick just daring him to speak –

"Now Sara – something we missed?" Nick was getting involved, he couldn't resist – he loved to tease Sara. When she frowned it just made him want her more – right now resisting pulling her into his arms and passionately kissing her.

More than pissing her off the team were ganging up on her and he knew he'd pay for that later. Sara looked at nick and shot him a 'your not getting any tonight' glare, "Nope, nothing" She shot.

"Well, I think they did" Warrick laughed.

"Rick" Sara growled, slugging him again in the arm, "Stop" She was serious.

But Catherine was now curious, "Oh, Now we need to know…Spill Rick"

"Sidle you better get thinking…how can you stop a handsome, charming guy like me from telling these losers?"

"I'll tell you how, 'Guys, a beer on me sound good?" She asked.

"The first three rounds on you, sound good" Warrick smiled triumphantly.

Sara had rage and anger playfully burning in her eyes, "Fine - first three and even throw in a pack of nuts…" She replied. Slamming her own locker, she turned and looked at Warrick who looked like he had just scored the winning touch down – "and you are not Handsome or charming"

He looked offended, and turned to face Catherine pointing at his smile, "oh Cath, tell me I'm charming" he pleaded.

Catherine laughed, as did Nick – the team had been getting along great lately and little arguments had formed – something was defiantly going on. She stepped forward and slapped his face lightly, "Charming…And …in certain light you may even be a little Handsome Rick."

"See" He winked at Sara.

"Yeah, yeah" She mumbled.

"Well looks like we're heading to the bar…" Nick beamed shutting his own locker –

"Looks like" Sara growled.

"Oh and Sar…" Catherine spoke, "We will find out about the bet…there are only so many rounds you can buy" before Sara could respond Catherine headed to the door of the break room pulling it open.

Sara just slapped Warrick on the shoulder, "You promised" she hissed.

Warrick just laughed, "Come on Sar… I'll beat you at some pool" he followed Catherine out. Nick and Sara were about to follow when he lent over and spoke, "I'm going to find out about the be right?"

"Not likely nicky" She explained. Teasing him by pulling away from his hovering lips – "Not in the lab" She smirked - before leaving.

----TBC


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N; Thankyou so much for the reviews. It really does mean so much to me. ;)_

**Part 3**

****"Oh man too bad Catherine couldn't come" Nick voiced as he sat at a table in the darkened, Smokey bar.

"Yeah it's too bad. But hell we'll do it again" Warrick smiled, he looked over to where Sara was stood at the bar, "I think I could manage another three days out of this one" he joked.

Nick looked to Sara, he had been keeping a close eyes on her ever since the first time she had go up to the bar and some guy was looking at her, giving her the eye. If it was any other time he would have been straight over to his 'girlfriend' and wrapped his arm around her waist showing everyone they couldn't have her. But with Warrick sat at his side all he could do was sit and watch. He was getting jealous, and couldn't help it. Some guy standing there, edging closer to Sara, a smile on his face – Nick wanted to get up. "So…you going to tell me what the bet was about bro?" Nick asked, still glancing at Sara every so often.

Warrick lifted his bottle to his mouth, and took a swig, then looked to Nick, "you'll have to wait and see"

Up at the bar Sara was trying to get served, it was proving difficult surprisingly even though it wasn't that busy. "So how about you tell me your name?"

Sara turned to look at the guy, "Excuse me?" she questioned.

"Come on Doll, let me get you a drink" he had a deep, gruff voice.

"I tell you what you can do…back up four or five steps" Sara shot, "And then go back to drinking your beer before you regret this" She looked back over the bar waiting to be served, silently hoping that Nick wasn't watching. Though she could feel his eyes burning into her back –

"One of them your guy?" The man asked, leaning closer to her again.

Sara looked to him, "What's it to you…" she shot.

"Lets just say…I'm perceptive…" he smirked, seductively as he looked her body up and down.  
"Well how about you observe my words carefully…I'm not interested"

--------------------

She looked across to Nick who was trying to open the door to his house, unsuccessfully she may add. He hadn't said much to her since they had left the bar. And she got the feeling he was pissed off. Leaning on the wall she tried to get a look at his eyes, most of the time his eyes told her everything that she needed to know. Before she could though Nick lost it and kicked the door.

"Nick" Sara shot, "What the hells got into you" she bent down and picked up the keys that he dropped.

"Into me… I'm surprised your even here?" He growled back at her. This clarified the fact that she was in fact the reason he was pissed.

"Where else would I be?" She asked, looking at him unsure as to what he was getting at.

"Well – you looked pretty sweet with the guy at the bar?" He accused.

Sara looked shocked, she laughed in disbelief. "You got to be kidding me, Right?"

His look told her all that she needed to know – he wasn't kidding at all. "He had his hands all over you" He shouted, catching the attention of more than one of the neighbors.

Sara looked around, then to Nick; "I'm not doing this with you" She growled throwing his keys at him, "not here".

She looked at him, "What do you want from me Nick?" She shouted, "I can only be who I am…you've known me long enough to know I'd never cheat on anyone. I thought you knew how much you meant to me?"

Nick looked over to the neighbor who was stood looking at the two of them, he turned his back and headed over to the door – this time successfully getting the key in and throwing it open.

Sara Rolled her eyes, and followed him in slamming it shut, "What do you want me to Say Nick?" she demanded.

"Nothing…I just…" he really didn't know what he wanted, he had no idea what was going on here.

"What? You just what?" She shouted.

"You're sending me crazy Sara, look what you're doing to me" He swung around to face her, "I'm jealous, like really jealous. I'm becoming this possessive guy who… I don't like."

"You're Jealous?" She asked, her tone softening, "Of what?"

"Of the way the guy was with you, I wanted to hit him Sara. I wanted to walk over and take you in my arms just to let everyone know you were mind but I couldn't"

"This isn't about the guy is it?" She demanded, Nick just looked into her eyes. "It's about you wanting them all to know, I mean…the team. You're pissed because no one knows about us."

"I'm pissed because, I'm crazy in love with you Sara" He explained.

"You're backwards Nick…you know that right" She shouted at him, "You do realize what you're saying?" she just wanted to be clear.

"I'm saying, I love you like crazy…and I want you to know that you're the only person that has ever turned me into a mad man!" The words were filled with anger.

"You're arguing with me because you love me?" She stopped shouting now, she more stammered the last out of her mouth - and just looked at him in disbelief, "You shouted at me out there in front of the whole neighborhood, because you're crazy in love"

Nick nodded his head, then took a few steps towards her briskly grabbing hold of her shirt taking the material into his fists and pulling her passionately into him, no chance to talk her lips were met with his and the two found themselves finally been able to give into the need to have each other. There was no one around to walk in on them, no one around to open the door to the Locker room, or the break room – just the two of them. He backed her up to the front door, pressing her against it and then pressing himself against her body.

------

"Why did you tell me it went fine last night?"

Sara turned in his arms, leaning her head on his bear chest as he ran his hand sensually up and down her back over his large cowboys jersey that she was wearing, from the top of her neck to the lower back – he sent a warm, burning sensation right to Sara's heart. She knew what he was talking about- when she had got in from shift the previous morning he had asked how it went and she had lied. She told him it was all good but it wasn't – it had been one of the hardest cases she'd had in a long while. She moved one of her hands to his chest, so the two were holding each other. "Couldn't tell you the truth…" She explained simply.

"Can you now?" He asked.

She thought a moment, and then she nodded slowly – "I can try"

"It's all I ask" He smiled warmly as he tightened the arm that was around her pulling her against him for support.

"I got an abuse case…thought I could handle it" Sara's words weren't rehearsed; she was reeling of her thoughts as they came. "I couldn't though…that bastard…Nick he bludgeoned her to death. He must have been looking into her eyes…really looking into her eyes before he killed her. Bringing it down on her…over and over…and…over" She stopped, Nick knew just what she was doing. She was picturing it all again, right now see was re living the scene. "No matter how long I do this job, I thought I'd never understand it" She mumbled.

"Understand what?" Nick purred softly, supportively.

"How…anyone can kill, how anyone can take the life of another person" Sara explained, she trailed off for a few moments then came back to him "She was pregnant" She offered, and then she sighed. "You know what's even sicker?"

"What?" He asked, "That the highest rate of domestic violence is when the women are pregnant."

Nick moved the hair back out of her eyes and tucked it behind her ear, "Hun?" he asked wanting to make sure she was okay as she seemed to have withdrawn a bit into a daze.

"I was sat in the interrogation room, in front of this bastard… I had the images of her body spread over the table…" She continued, "he showed no emotion, no remorse or regret. I lost it… I went for him. Before I knew it I had him on the ground and I just kept hitting him…looking into his eyes and I felt nothing." She was taking sort breaths now, unable to talk without gasping.

"Sara, Honey…Baby" Nick had never seen Sara get so worked up. She really wasn't breathing now… she turned over and lay with her back on the bed looking up at the ceiling. Nick lent over on his side, moving his had to her arm.

"I so scared because…I felt it" She explained, moving her hand up to her head she pushed her hand through her hair and let the tears finally came. It wasn't something that Sara often did, but right now she was crying like she had never before – "You want the truth…last night…I understood…" She spat, "I could have killed him and I wouldn't have cared" She pulled her arm away from Nick, she didn't want him to touch her right now and he respected this. Nick couldn't believe what was happening right now, Sara was so broken. "Grissom pulled me off..." She continued, she clenched her fists as though she was reliving it, "but I kept…throwing punches…over and…" She stopped, she looked to Nick, "I'm so scared." She explained.

He lay next to her, he moved his hands around her body knowing that no words could comfort her instead her held onto her. She tuned on her side and buried her head in his neck breaking down altogether. He just held onto her, knowing that Sara may very well be in the worst state she had been in a long while.

Tbc…


	4. Chapter 4

_ thanks for the reviews guys, you know it makes me smile! here's an update for you! _**  
**

**Part 4**

Nick walked aimlessly around his apartment, Sara had decided to take a shower and he knew that she needed some time to herself after everything she had told him earlier. He just wished he could help her, wished he could take her pain away – but knew that it wasn't possible. Sara had to fight her way through this – and knowing her it would be to bury it deep inside her and he doubted if the two of them would really say that much more about the whole thing…but he'd be by her side through it all. He decided pacing wasn't helping much so he fell back onto the couch turning on his Play station and picking up a controller. He went into auto pilot as he began to play the game – his mind thinking about the woman he loved. He wondered how much a person had to go through, how much pain they'd have to face until they could be happy. It's all he wanted for her…to be happy.

"So Nicky?" He was broken from his thoughts around half an hour later by the brunette herself stepping in front of the screen. He instantly threw the controller down as he slowly looked his girl up and down, she was his – and he knew it, And there was nothing that made Nick Stokes happier. She was stood in a pair of tight fitting jeans, black boots and a white, sleeveless T shirt. Although looking very casually she looked amazing. "What do you think?" She asked.

"I think you are going to have to fight me off all Day" he explained as he reached forward taking hold of the waist band of her jeans and pulling her into him. She found herself straddling his lap as he lent back on the sofa looking lovingly up into her eyes – he knew what she was doing. She wanted to act like that whole thing this morning never happened, and he let her. He guessed she was probably most scared that he would treat her differently, but he didn't. He teased her the same way he did every night before they headed off to work "Please…let me ring Cath and tell her we'll be late…" he smirked as he ran his finger slowly up her stomach making his way to her chest. "Really late" his voice became husky.

"Why…Nicky, would you be trying to seduce me? Again?" Sara asked.

"Why, maybe - is it working?" he asked his hands moving across her stomach and her waist.

"Maybe…"

"Does that mean?" He reached into her jean pocket and pulled her mobile… "I can call her then?" He joked.

Sara smiled, "No, you can't" She warned, and then smiled, "I'm sure she'd love to know why you are calling off my phone though! And then…" She smiled as she ran her own hands over his chest, "By tonight, the whole Lab would know".

He scowled, "Damn you…you're going to make me lust after you all day huh?"

"You know it babe" She smiled. "But see, you do the exact same thing to me"

"IS that so?"

"That's so" Sara explained. He moved his hands down her back and pushed them into the back pockets of her jeans– she turned more serious and began to mess with the opened button on the top of his shirt – "I'm …really sorry about…up…up stairs" she stuttered becoming less confident as the act faded.

"Hey" He shot, pulling her body closer to his, "Don't be…I'm here for you" he explained. Sara nodded her head, and then looked back down to the button. "Are you feeling better now?" he asked, seen as it was her who brought it up he figured he would question her a little.

"Not really… I mean, I can't get it out of my head" She explained reluctantly. "how I felt, when I had him pinned to the floor…" She stopped, looked away from nick to her hands.

"Will you be able to make it through today…you could always crash here and I'll go and make up some reason for your absence." He was trying to come up with anything that would make her feel better.

She smiled, he was always sweet like that - "As long as your there…I think I'll be…okay" she replied, now moving her flat palms up and down his chest over his shirt.

"Well I'll always be here for you" He explained. "And I'm not just saying that because you are looking so hot" he joked, sensing she wanted to get off the subject, but knowing it wouldn't be the last of it.

"Now, are you sure about that Stokes?" She asked.

"Well, not completely. Because right now you're driving me crazy…you better kiss me already" he scolded. Pushing her body closer into him as he sunk back further into the sofa, she towered over him, smiling as she lowered her mouth to his, there lips brushing slightly she spoke, "Mm, maybe you should call Catherine…tell he something came up"

"Don't tease me" he warned, with a smirk.

She lent forward only letting their lips lock for a second before pulling back with an evil smile and glint in her eye, he tried to reach up and meet her but she moved her hands to his neck and slid them around the back of his head pushing her fingers into his hair. "Looks like you'll have to wait till later?" She smirked teasing him; she whispered it into his ear allowing her lips to linger slightly. She tried to get up, but he stopped her. Pulling her back he spun her under him – and moved so he was lay on her now pinning her down on the sofa - he spoke, even more husky into her ear his lips brushing against her neck – officially driving her crazy. "Don't think so…" He moved in and they both became more passionate. Her hands running down his back and his exploring her body over her clothes.

-------

"Hey Ricky?" Catherine beamed as she pulled the door open. There were kids running all around the house.

Warrick smiled, "Hey, Cath…how's the party going?"

"Twenty kids running around my house…lets just say I'm glad you're here" She explained – moving to the side so that Warrick could enter.

"So where's the birthday girl?"

"Try back garden…and have fun" She joked slapping him on the shoulder. "Nicky should be out there already. Sara's in the kitchen… and Grissom still no show"

"Right I gotcha" Warrick walked through towards the place. "I hear that there's a bouncy castle." He smirked, "I'm going to have to try that out for you" he explained.

"I expected nothing less" Catherine explained as they continued through, "And I have a nice little wager for you"

"I'm listening" Warrick's attention went to the blond.

"Fifty that you can't get Gris on that thing"

Warrick smirked, "Your on"

--------------

"So Sara you going to tell me who the guy is"

Sara turned from the kitchen counter where she was putting ice cream into a bowl to Catherine who was walking over from the fridge to her with a bowl of jelly. "What guy?" She asked.

"Sar, I'm CSI give me some credit" Catherine scolded. Sara and she were now stood side by side putting out the desert.

"You were tracking my car?" Sara was overly suspicious now, "You go threw my trash?" she gave the older woman a strange look – "how did you know?"

"Nope, no tracking or stalking you…just had to look at your neck" Catherine tucked Sara's hair behind her ear, "Love bite" She explained.

Sara instinctively moved her hand and covered her neck – "Don't prove anything"

"Well Sar, you're not the type of girl to let someone suck on your neck if you aren't going out!"

"And how would you know that?" Sara smirked, going back to the ice cream, "I mean, after all the years working CSI you should know any claim needs to be supported by evidence."

Catherine nodded her head and began to scoop the jelly into the bowls, "That would be true, and I have no evidence to prove that it wasn't some guy on the strip who did that to your neck. But I do have an eye witness that is more than reliable letting me know your with a guy"

Sara became more worried by the second, did they know about her and Nick? Had someone seen them? "Who?" Sara asked.

"Who – well, Greg told me you turned him down again…but the reason for it this time was that you had a guy"

"Very good Catherine… and seen as you like putting these lil' puzzles together I'll let you figure out who all by yourself" She smirked, "Now, we should get the ice cream out there before Warrick starts moaning."

Catherine sighed, "Come on Sar…a little hint?" she pleaded. But she just walked away.

Tbc ….


	5. Chapter 5

_once again, i appreciate all the reviews you guys. It means alot. Really helps out my muse too lol. Well...hope you like this part..._

**Part 5**

"Mom" Lindsey screamed breathlessly threw laughter as she ran towards the house, straight into Sara's Legs.

"Wow, Kiddo" Sara crouched down taking hold of the little girls arms, "What's the rush?"

"Uncle Nicky…he keeps fighting with us all" Lindsay pointed over to where Nick was stood at the bouncy castle grabbing the children and throwing them back on. Sara smirked, he was good with kids, she had to give him that.  
"Well, I tell you what…how about I come and beat him up for you?" Sara asked the young girl.

"You can't beat Nicky up…you're a girl!" Lindsay shot with a frown.

"Well truth is, I'm much stronger than Nick – but how's this if I can't do it I'll call for Rick? But don't tell your mom that I was resolving your problems with violence – got it Kiddo?" Lindsay seemed happy with this so she nodded her head and took hold of Sara's hand and pulled her towards the bouncy castle.

The large castle was coved by kids, now if Grissom was around the brunette was sure some Bug reference would have been quoted. "I hear you're been mean to the kids Nick" She shouted over the laughing children who were running towards nick and he was grabbing hold of them and throwing them back into the castle. She had to say right now he looked really sexy. He was stood in a pair of faded jeans, and a white shirt – the top three buttons undone and the sleeves rolled up. Thrown onto his head was his very vintage Cowboy hat from back home. Wow, now did he look hot! Sara smirked as he looked to her.

-------------

"Hey Cath, you better get out here" Warrick called back into the house where he just came from.

"What is it?"

Warrick stood looking to were Sara was with Nick and the kids, all of them wrestling. It seemed that Nick had gotten a few of the boys that were there on his team as they had Sara now pinned against the bouncy castle floor as Nick fought with Lindsay and a few of her friends. The laughter seemed contagious as it didn't take long for Catherine and Warrick to start. They could hear Sara threatening Nick. "Well, looks like the cake waits huh?" Catherine smiled.

"Looks like…" He walked over and took a seat at the table – it seemed Sara and nick had all the kids participating in a free for all wrestling match and all that Catherine could hope was none of the kids left with a black eye that she'd have to explain to the parents – she shook her head wondering what she'd say – my two fully adult CSI colleagues were the cause of your Childs injury. Catherine knew that they wouldn't get it that far though.

"So is your sister going to stop by?" Warrick asked.

"She's at a work thing…but we are going out for a family dinner tomorrow" Catherine explained.

"Sounds nice…Lindsay seems happy"

"Yeah…she deservers to be after everything with her Dad" Catherine explained.

"How is she with that?"

"Honestly I'm not sure…she hardly talks about it"

"She'll come around … she got the best mother around and uncle, Nicky, Ricky and Grissom – along with Sar" Warrick always knew what to say to make Catherine feel better.

"Yeah… thanks Rick"

"No problem…just want to see you guys happy" he explained, "talking about happy…It's good to See Sara happy, don't you think?"

"Yeah…it's funny; I've never seen her act like this in all the years I've known her"

"Well I didn't think her and kids got on" Warrick agreed.

"Yeah…" Catherine mused, "You know she's got a guy right?"

"Really, Sidle is spoken for?" he asked, "Who is it?"

"She won't say"

"Really - Well this seems like the perfect opportunity to get it out of her."

Catherine saw the glint in his eye, "What you have in mind?"

He just smirked.

----------------------

"Hey Gris…your just in time" Catherine smiled widely as she opened the door to Gil, her long time friend and boss as they hugged.

"Well, good thing I decided to leave court early then huh?" Grissom smiled, "Things are going okay then?"

"Yeah, things are just great. Lindsay's happy, the kids are happy and even Sara…is Happy" Catherine joked, "Come through to the garden…"

"Well I have a present for Lindsay, where is she?" He asked following her through the house

"Probably trying to help Sara" Catherine laughed.

"Help Sara?" Grissom asked.

"Yeah, trust me…with what 'Rick has planned she needs all the help she can get her hands on."

They stepped out into the garden to see Warrick stood, looking over to the castle where they were all still fighting. "Hey Look who's shown" Catherine called.

"Oh Gris, hey…I'll ask how the case went right after you do me a favour before Sara finds away to get the kids off her"

"Favour?" Gil asked.

"You get this on camera" He threw the camera to Grissom and then looked to Catherine, "You ready?" He asked.

"You got it" Her slight southern accent came though- with a smile she walked over to where she had been instructed and Warrick ran towards the castle.

"OKAY" He called out, jumping onto the castle, "Kids, listen to me…we are going to play a little game…it's called, if you want cake and don't want to get wet I'd get off the castle now" He was good with kids, As Sara lay covering herself from the scrambling bodies that were getting of the castle she had decided that it was due to the fact he still acted like one. She hared him encouraging them with a clapping of his hand, "Come on…go, go, go…"

When she was sure that she was safe she looked up, trying to catch her breath only to see Nick jump to his feet, "Hey, they got my hat" He shouted, "You guys are so dead"

Sara saw he was going after the kids so she grabbed him by the arm and managed to turn it into a restraint…she had done self defence as they all did as part of the job.

"Linds, hide the hat" Sara shouted to the daughter of her friend as her and Nick fought.

"Sara your dead…" Nick growled as he struggled against her hold.

"Yeah she is…" he grabbed Sara and got her off of Nick pulling her around he held her to his chest, one of her arms pinned behind her back and the other one held to her side by Warrick's arm that was around her waist.

"Rick…what the hell" Sara tried to pull free. She could hear the kids screaming in delight and knew that this wasn't going to be good.

"I've been informed that you have a guy" Warrick explained, this also got Nick's attention as he scrambled to the front of the castle and off it standing to the side of where his friend was holding Sara.

"Catherine" Sara growled knowing just who had told Warrick.

"Yep…So Sara what's going to happen it that you are going to tell me who it is or…" He asked.

"Or what?" Sara was still fighting against Warrick.

"Or this…" Sara looked up to see Catherine stood with the hose.

"NO…No guys. I mean it" She growled menacingly. "Nick…stop them!" She shouted.

"Sorry Sara…no can do…I want to know who the guy is too" he smirked.

She scowled at him, "Your all dead" She shot.

"All you have to do is tell us…" Warrick explained,

"Yeah Sar…just tell us" Nick shot.

"Catherine, I mean it…" Sara knew the guys weren't going to help so she went to the woman stood in front of her.

"Sorry Sidle, you pushed me too far" Catherine explained, "you should have just told me"

"Do this I'll kill you all" Sara shouted.

...tbc


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N:sorry that it has taken so long for an update. Works a little hectic...but i am so greatful for all of the reviews that i have recieved. It means alot to know you guys are liking this. Becasue i'm loving writing it. I'll try not to keep you wating to long. Thanks for reading. _  


**Part 6 **

"Want a little help getting out of those wet clothes?" His voice was low and husky, but it didn't break through the barriers she had put up.

She turned, and glared at the guy stood behind her, the death glare that she knew he wouldn't dare mess with. "You're not going to be helping me out of any kind of clothes any time soon" She growled, and then she turned and stood face to face with Nick. He backed up a little sensing he'd pushed her too far. "you think your going to get away with that?"

"Hey, I was just doing what you asked baby…keeping the relationship between us" He defended, "Would you rather I'd told them?"

"I'd rather that you'd helped me" She spat, "You could have stopped them"

"Probably…but…it'd have been less fun" He smirked, "But if you'd like I can go and tell them right now"

"Too late…I'm wet already. And by the way…there's nothing to tell them because I'm breaking up with you"

"You don't mean that" He shot. She wasn't the only one that had gotten wet in the attack, his shirt was stuck to his body reveling his athletic build – she couldn't help but want to kiss him right then.

"Don't I… and whys that?" She asked.

"Because...you love me" He offered, with a smile.

She shrugged her shoulders, "I did – until you let them do that"

"How about you let me make it up to you baby?" He asked, as he moved his arms around her waist.

"Not going to happen…and especially not in Catherine's bathroom. Got it…" Sara shot. They had both been drying up in the bathroom, and knowing the door was locked Nick had no fear – he ran his hands down from her waist and pulled her into him. Their bodies pressed together. Sara smirked, as she reached up and took his cowboy hat, which he'd gotten back of the kids, and put it onto her head. "I said no cowboy"

"oh come on…I feel really guilty" He lent down and began to kiss her neck – "Nick…you should feel guilty…you just let them attack me." She explained. As she tried to fight against the urge to pull him into a passionate kiss, he looked up at her – their eyes meeting.

"What can I do to make it better?"

Sara thought a moment, "Get the camera of Gris…then…I'll think about forgiving you"

"Can I help you out of these cloths then?"

"Maybe…later" She smirked as she pushed him away –

-------------------

"She's going to be pissed"

"It's your fault"

"You told me" he defended.

"Well you came up with the 'plan'!" Catherine mocked Warrick as the two of them stood near the cake. The kids had gone back to playing, as the two of them put candles on the cake they were arguing over whose fault it was.

"You should go and apologies"

"Are you crazy…she's ready to kill. I think she's finished Nick off in there"

"What the hell was he thinking going in there after her anyway?" Catharine asked, "I mean – that's just asking to be murdered"

If she does kill him do you think that'd we'd be able to process the scene?" Warrick questioned, "I mean, we'd be personally involved…"

"To heck with it been personal – we wouldn't get to do it because Sara would come and kill us straight after." Catherine responded as she looked from the now finished Cake to Warrick – "Will you get the matches?"

"Why?" He asked,

"Because there in the kitchen, which is in the house…which is where Sara is."

"So you want me to be killed?" He asked

"I have a kid Rick, have a heart" Catherine gave him her best pleading look.

He sighed, "Girl you owe me" he walked toward away.

Catherine smiled and silently hoped that Sara did get hold of him – then she looked out to the mass of kids that filled her garden as they played on the bouncy castle laughing and joking – "Hey Kids…cake in a few minuets" She called out.

------------

"I've been thinking…"

Sara was sat on the bouncy castle, the kids had left a little over an hour ago – as the party broke up the rest of the team had offered to stay and help clean up.

"That's never good Sidle" Nick smirked. He was sat next to her, with a bottle of water in his hand.

"Hey" She slapped him on the arm, "I'm still mad at you for earlier…you're real close to spending the rest of the week alone in that bed of yours." She threatened.

"I am huh?" He asked, "I think that's an empty threat. Your bluffing"

"You want to try me Nicky?" She growled, he didn't respond, "DIdn't think so" She smiled.

"So what were you thinking about?" He asked.

Sara looked over to the doorway of the kitchen where Warrick was stood with Grissom the both of them talking – Catherine must have been inside sending the last of the guests' home with the parents. All in all the party had gone well, and it seemed Lindsay and all of her friends had had a great time – after the cake, the guys, Nick and Rick had forced everyone to par take in a game of football, it had gone great. And surprising to Catherine and Sara they both were great around kids.

"About us" She explained,

"Really…so there is still an us after today?" he smiled,

"Only just" She growled playfully, "and only because you got the camera off of them"

"Yeah…the camera" Nick smiled, "would I let you down?" he wanted to reach out to her but knew that Grissom and Warrick were behind so he couldn't. "What was is about us that caused you to become this serious?" He asked.

"What is it we got Nick?" She asked,

"Hold on…you want to do this here…around…"

"I need to know" She explained, cutting him off and their eyes locking.

Nick looked to the house to see Catherine walk out into the garden with Lindsay – Sara didn't talk about the relationship around the guys … he had no idea what she was up to. "This…between us…it's the best thing that's ever happened to me Sara…"

"It's more than Sex?" She asked, though she knew the answer just wanting to hear it.

He looked into her eyes, confused as to just where this had come from, "What's wrong with you?"

"I need to know that, you want this to be a long term thing"

"I want this to be a forever thing" He explained.

"That's the best thing I hared all Day Stokes. You know that right?" a smile formed, she couldn't help it.

Nick smiled, "Tell me you want it to be forever"

"Forever and Always" She nodded her head. Then she slowly moved her hand to his that was rested on the castle next to her. Her own trembling a little as she prepared herself for what she was about to do. She looked from where their hands met to his eyes. They burned into her, burying deep into her heart.

"What do you want right now?" She asked.

He didn't break eyes contact, and he'd never been this serious "Right now I want to kiss you." He explained.

She nodded "Than do it…" She told him.

"What?"

"Do it, Kiss me" her tone was deep and husky, so sexy that Nick wanted nothing more than to kiss her, to take her in his arms.

"But…what about…" He turned his head to see Catherine, Warrick, Gil and Lindsay all sat on the patio wondering just what had caused Sara to do this. Then he felt her fingers entwine with his pulling his attention and gaze back to her. Their eyes met, again.

"You want them to know still?" She asked, "If you still want them to know then kiss me"

"I want the world to know…" He explained, "As long as you want it too" knowing that she was the one who wanted this to be private he wanted to make sure that it was what she wanted now and he wasn't pushing her into it.

"You told me last night you wanted to show everyone I was yours - you wanted them all to know… so show them Nick." He didn't need to be told again, his saw in Sara's eyes she'd thought about this – "I'm yours Nick…just don't hurt me"

"Never" he dropped the water bottle and with his free hand moved it to her cheek and moved in kissing her passionately. She opened her mouth letting him in, for the first time fully opening up herself to the world. She closed her eyes, been ripped apart by his love – as it held tight onto her heart. Her hand moved to chest as she took hold of his shirt pulling him closer - she'd put everything she had out there now. Risked been crushed, publicly if this didn't work out. But he was worth the risk...he was worth everything in her eyes.

_TBC... _


	7. Chapter 7

_Thankyou for all the reviews means alot - sorry that it's been a while, but i have a load of work. Hope to sort it all out soon. Here's an extra long part for you guys ;) enjoy..._

**Part 7**

"Wow…I think I know who Sara's guy is" Warrick blurted out, his moth full of cake.

"What?" Catherine asked, as she sat with Lindsay on her lap holding her daughter close.

"Sara's guy…" Warrick explained.

"It's nick" Grissom finished as he looked to where Warrick was pointing.  
"What, NICK?" Catherine also looked over, in shock her jaw dropped. Out of all the people that she had thought it may have been Nick had never come to mind. Greg, sure … he was always trying to get with Sara but not Nick. They were all looking over to where Nick and Sara were sharing a passion filled kiss.

"Now way!" Warrick was just as shocked, "And they kept if from us"

"What the hells going on in that place?" Catherine asked.

-----

He lent back and looked into her eyes, knowing he had the dopiest smirk – but he didn't care. "So you think they noticed hun?" He asked.

Sara looked over his shoulder; she had to admit she did fear their response. She could see them all, they looked as if they'd been slapped around the face – "I'd say so…" She sat back again looking into his eyes, "I love you, and I just want you to know that. Before anything else happens…right now, what we have here is the perfect I've been looking for." She explained, "I'm sorry if…if I mess up what we have, and I tend to do that a lot. Mess things up I mean. ..and…"

"Your rambling." He explained,

"I can't help it…" She sighed, "I've never felt like this"

"I love you Sar…" He said moving his hand to her waist and moving in to kiss her again, as his lips met with hers he murmured, "no matter what happens from now…I'll never stop loving you" His smile grew as he took his hat off and put it on her head pulling it down over her eyes, she tilted her head back so she could see under the rim. They kissed, and when they pulled back this time she growled, "You wanted to tell them, so you deal with them now" Sara knew that the team weren't going to let the two of them date, and not get a laugh from it.

--------

"Do it…kiss me" Sara mumbled, imitating herself, over and over under her breath as she walked down the corridors of LVPD crime lab, "What the hell was I thinking?" She asked no one – she was dragging her feet behind her buying herself as much time as possible to try and prepare herself from the onslaught she knew she would walk into; the guys had pulled them apart back at Catherine's – and Nick been less helpful. She loved him, she knew she did but she was scared of loving openly, in front of everyone.

Usually she'd be the first to roll up at work and be sitting in the break room but tonight she'd left it late, not wanting to be questioned. As she turned about to enter the locker room she was stopped by the familiar voice, "Sidle, what have you gone and done?" he shouted.

Sara shook her head and continued only for him to follow her in, "Greg" She greeted.

"Don't Greg me…you've broke my heart"

"Oh so you know…"

"The whole lab knows - it's not how I should have hared it Sara…through the lab techs" He growled.

"the whole lab huh?" Inside Sara silently died, she hated knowing that she was the topic of convocation that was on the lips of most of the lab.

"Yeah…so, it's true…you hooking up with the Texan?" Greg questioned.

"Yeah…it's true Greg…sorry"

Greg moved forward so he was now stood directly in front of her, "Are you happy?" he asked

"Very" She nodded, with her gapped tooth smile.

"Well then how can I stay mad at you…" He reached forward and hugged her, "I'm happy for you too. I just don't see what he's got I don't."

Sara laughed, "Well don't tell nick but…you are just too good for me. Nick was back up" she joked offering the younger CSI a warm smile and another hug, Happy that he was been supportive in his own way. Sara did have a soft spot for him but nothing that extended friends – and he knew it, this was the game they played.

"I knew that" He explained, "And maybe I am too good for you" he winked, he turned and left, offering from the doorway, "I'm happy, and if Nicky ever does ANYTHING to upset you I'll sort it"

-----------

"You know she's got us all looking out for her right?"

Nick looked up from his magazine to see Catherine stood glaring at him, "Hey to you to" he shot

"Nick, you hurt Sara – I hurt you"

"Y'all think I'm going to hurt her?" He asked, Warrick had said much the same thing, "What if she hurt me? Huh?" he asked.

"You would be able to sort yourself out…look I'm just saying…" She began to pour herself some coffee, "She cares for you…so be careful. We all know Sara. And we all know that she takes a long time to open up…"

Nick stood up, he walked over to where Catherine was at the counter, "I'm not going to hurt her, I…" he stopped a moment and looked to the floor, "I love her, so…you don't have to worry"

Catherine turned and looked at her younger CSI co worker, she was shock, "Nicky, love?"

"Yeah…love"

"Wow, hell…this is big." Catherine had a smile creep upon her face, "Real big" She reached forward and hugged her friend, her motherly tone kicking in – really she was a mother to the younger CSI's including Greg. "I'm happy for you" She explained.

"Thanks" Nick smiled,

"You know though…you could have told up. Sure, we had a go at mine earlier and Warrick practically beat you up for taking _his girl_…" Both smiled at the memory, Warrick had been over to where the two where at the castle in no time and pulled Nick away before the two play wrestled.

"Hey she's my Girl…you know that"

"Yeah I do…" Catherine nodded, "and play her you'll be a dead man." She shot.

"You know what, if I do anything in the slightest to hurt her, or upset her I give you my permission to kick me in the head – how does that sound?

"Sounds like you deserve a shot at making her happy" Catherine winked, and slapped his arm.

------------

Sara lingered in the break room, unsure if she was ready to start been the CSI again. Things had been great today – and for a while she had even forgot about the abuse case the other night but now – she was going to be heading back into the field and she was going to have to look at these scenes where the monsters kill and walk away – Sara felt like one of these monsters, deep down there was something in her that was ready to kill the other night and it scared her.

"Are you sitting in here all night Girl?"

Sara looked up to Warrick who was walking into the room, "Hey Rick" She managed as she slammed her locker, "no, I'm coming"

"Good to hear it… but can I have a word first?" He moved and sat on the bench next to Sara,

"Sure…" Sara turned to him.

"I just…I mean, I want to say that despite the way I was messing around this afternoon and taking shots at you two, teasing you both…I want you to know I am _really_ happy for you. And that, you know you're like a sister to me so…if he does anything…I sort him" Warrick wasn't one for soft mushy speeches and Sara knew when he was doing something like this then he meant it.

Sara smiled softly, as she lent forward and hugged Warrick, she wasn't usually one for much physical contact but the team were been extra sentimental today and it would be impossible not to hug him – "Thanks Rick…means a lot. To know someone has my back"

"Yeah…well you got Me, Cath and Greg so…you got a lot of someone's" He winked.

This was more of a family than Sara had ever had – and this was the first time in her life she ever felt that she truly belonged somewhere.

-----------

"Okay guys…" Grissom walked into the break room to hand out assignments, he looked around to see only two CSI's sat at the table, "Where is everyone?"

"We're here" Sara explained as herself and Warrick slipped into the room –

"Nice of you to join us" Catherine joked, then looked back to Gil – "So you got anything interesting for us?"

"Not much – must be a slow week for murderers" Grissom mumbled, "Sara – B&E solo. Here's the address – looks to be an inside job" he held the paper out to her and she took it. "Keep posted" then he looked to the other two "Rick your with me on a DB, north off the strip" he explained as he passed him the Slip, "And Cath join Nick on the case" he explained –

"Solo?" Grissom looked to the direction of the seemingly confused voice

"Yeah…you deserve it Sar" he explained. Sara looked his way and the two looked to be saying something with their eyes, a silent conversation that had the rest of them confused, then Grissom spoke – "any trouble just pick up the phone…"

Sara shrugged her shoulders, "Fine, I'll…see you guys later" without looking up she left the room, leaving a fairly concerned team.

Grissom looked to Nick, "Word?" He asked

Nick nodded, and the other's left – "I'll be in the Tahoe" Warrick explained

"I'll meet you in Lay out Nicky" Catherine shut the door as she left.

Nick looked to Gil, "I just want to ask you something" he explained

"Ask away" Nick replied

"Can you…try and talk to Sara about seeing the lab psychiatrist? She won't listen to me but…she might if you…just suggested it"

"What? Gris…"

"I know, this is unprofessional but…I'm worried about her… just, try and convince her – have a shot" without another word he offered a nod of his head and left the room.

------

"Officer?" Sara asked as she ducked under the tape.

The officer offered his hand, "Stephens" he replied.

"CSI Sara Sidle" She explained taking his hand, "So what's happened?"

"B&E, inside job by the looks – no forced entry from what I can see – cleared the scene it's all yours" he explained, "It's odd though… only one case was cleared in the jewelry store. I mean a hell of a lot of trouble for one case"

"Where's the manager?" Sara asked

"He's on his way…"

"Thank you…I'll be in there then"

"I'll be here if you need me" she nodded her head and continued through to the scene.

------

Many hours later, Catherine and Nick finally closed the case. Happy of this they headed towards the break room. "So you going to tell me what has you so pissed?" Catherine asked as they walked down the corridor.

"Nothing…I just …lot on my mind" he explained.

"I'd say you need to relax…are we all heading to the bar tonight"

"Someone Say bar?" Warrick asked as he walked out of the lab he was in to join the pair, "we going and it's on Sara"

"What?" Catherine asked.

"I'll get us some free beer of the Brunette don't worry" he laughed.

Nick just rolled his eyes, and Catherine had to smile.

All three turned into the break room to See Sara lent on the counter speaking into her mobile, "I can't release the scene, no…" she was angry they could all see that, "This is an ongoing investigation Sir…meaning until I close it your business stays shut. Well talk to your insurance about that…I'm CSI, I couldn't care less about you losing out on business, and LVPD will not refund or compensate you" She spat, "Fine, call my Supervisor, Mr. Gill Grissom… and my badge number's 544 877" Sara growled, before she cut off her phone and pushed it back into her holster. The team was pretty sure that he hadn't asked for the badge number but she'd reeled it off anyway.

She pushed her hand through her hair, "Sar?" Nick asked

"Insurance" Sara looked as though a light bulb went off in her head, she ignored the presence of the team, and she grabbed her folder and left the room quickly.Leaving a confused and very concerned Nick - who looked to the rest of the team - those who looked equally confused and worried.

_ tbc..._


	8. Chapter 8

_Sorry that it has taken so long to post, but here it is Part 8 and we seem to be getting into a plot :) yay. And thankyou all so much for the reviews_

**Part 8**

"Sara it's me…look, just give me a call- they said you left the lab hours ago. Where the hell are you? I'm getting worried now so…just give me a call" Nick sighed, he was beyond worried – Sara was acting strange, too strange. What the hell was going on with her? It had been around three weeks since they had revealed their love to the team – since the day everyone found out and things were fine, when it was the two of them. Everyone was supportive, happy even – though Greg had become overly protective for the Brunette CSI. He and Sara had formed a friendship – a strong one at that. Walking over to the sofa he took a seat and sighed again, what was he going to do with her- things were getting ridiculous – she has been drinking more than usually, not sleeping and some days not even showing up at home from shift to shift – he was worried – not only about today, but about how she was coping. One thing they all knew, all the CSIs knew, was that when this starts happening it leads to a no good road where the only stop off is at the end – BURNOUT city! Every CSI knew another who burnt out and quit, Nick didn't want that CSI to be his Sara, but that looked to be where all this was heading.

He couldn't sleep, not when he didn't know where she was. He tried absently channel surfing but gave up after a few minuets, deciding that it wasn't helping. He thought about calling again, or about calling some of the team – Greg maybe, she may be with him. It wasn't that he was needy or possessive – but lately, Sara wasn't been herself and every member of the team had seen it. They were all worried. Maybe he should try heading over to her apartment – he decided against it, he'd just wait till the start of shift later, he knew that he'd walk in to see Sara sat in the break room with coffee in hand looking like hell.

-------

And that's exactly what he found many hours later, he didn't even bother to stop by the locker room he turned straight into the break room and looked at her, "You're a mess" he shot.

"Mm, thanks" She mumbled back, holding her head in her hand and coffee in the other. "You're a sweetheart – you always know what to say" Sarcasm ran from her words.

"We need to talk" He shot.

"Talk, sorry honey…no can do. Time to work…" She said pointing at her watch, "maybe after shift." She'd been drinking, and this was the kind of Sara she was after she drank – unreasonable.

Nick lost it; turning around her walked over to the door and threw it shut. "I don't give a damn… we are going to talk"

Sara groaned as the slamming of the door was like a hammer to her skull.

"What the hell are you playing at – you've been drinking…you can't be in here like this. Grissom will have you out with no hesitation" He was angry, more than angry actually. She's been drinking and looked to be nursing a hangover –

"Don't treat me like a kid" She shot back.

"Well, I wouldn't if you didn't act like one" He shouted, "I can't believe this, look at you – you are a complete mess." Nick lent over the table looking down on her, "What are you playing at Sara? I was worried about you"

"Don't be worried…I'm fine"

"If you need a bottle of JD to tell you your fine then you really aren't" He spat with so much hate – not for Sara, for the direction she was heading, "Pull it together Sara…you got it. You're not holding up, everyone around this place can see you're dropping."

"Dropping? What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"You're losing it…" He spat bluntly, then his tone fell into a more concern filled "I think you, need to – go see the therapist Sara"

She stood up with this, "We've had this convocation Nick, and you know how it's going to end. I'm not seeing a shrink – not again." She spat, she didn't want to go through this again with him. He'd brought it up a few times now and with each time she was becoming more angered. Her heart ached when she looked at him, she could see his concern but her mind was blinded by anger - she was sick of this feeling, the feeling she was letting him down. She hated what was going on with them – all that they did was fight lately. "What do you see – when you look at me – who do you see?" Sara asked him.

"Sara, don't turn it into this" He growled, this fighting, lately had become nothing unusual, "I'm worried right now. This, here, this is me worrying about you" he shot.

"I'm fine" she shouted, as if shouting it louder would make it more believable – but it didn't. Usually, with her problems she'd turn to Nick and he'd helped her through them – lately though she'd turned to the bottle, she'd withdrawn away from him.

"FINE! You're Fine?" He through the chair in front of him forward and then looked at her, both looked ready to kill. "Well, sorry to break this to you, but you don't look fine, and you sure as hell aren't acting like it." His own anger was taking over now, he wanted nothing more than to help her through what ever it the hell it was she was going through but she wouldn't let him. She just kept pushing him away – "I'm worried about you Sara…" He explained, "And, I'm not the only one"

Something hit her then, she moved around the table so the two were now facing each other, "Oh, so what?" She asked, "You guys are all talking about me now?" It just happened that at this point the door to the break room was opened by Catherine and Warrick walking in.

Sara went to walk away but Nick grabbed hold of her arm, "Wait, it's not like that and you know it" He looked at the woman who usually held so much strength – and something was different she looked tired and her eyes seemed glazed over – this wasn't his Sara. At first it had started off as her just not sleeping, but over the last week, or two she'd hit the bottle pretty hard. And Nick could pin point the exact location in time this had started and it all went back to the night he'd held her in his arms and let her cry – the night before the party at Catherine's – she hadn't spoken about her pains to Nick since then, that's when the bottle – in her opinion had become a better option.

Sara looked into his eyes, and this made her want to just fall into his arms and hide away from everyone and everything that was hurting her but she couldn't, she hated herself for doing this to him – she knew that distancing herself from him was hurting him but if she were to fall apart in her arms – she be relying on him – and relying on anybody killed Sara.

"Then what's it like Nicky?" She spat, pulling her arm free – then turned to Face the team who had assembled, Catherine, Warrick and Greg – "I tell you what, next time you guys want to voice your concern talk to me, and don't go through the 'o so caring' boyfriend!"

They all just looked at her, uncomfortable – she shook her head – "What nothing to say? No one here think that I need to see a shrink? What about and Alcohol anonymous meeting? Should I head of to one of them? Come on guys…talk to me"

"Sara stop" Nick spoke, "don't do this"

"Want me to stop! You started it…I was the one who said wait till after shift but you just had to sort it out now. Well was it worth is Nick, now the whole god damn team get to see another in the long string of arguments between up – how about the next one takes place in the middle of the lab – the techs will love to see this"

"What are you trying to prove Sara?" He shot.

"What am I trying to prove?" She asked.

"Yeah…I know you're strong, I know you're able to handle this by yourself but you're not by yourself anymore. I just want to help you out. To be there for you – so why won't you let me do that?"

"I'm not doing this" She explained, "I'm not standing here and doing this with you."

_**TBC…**_


	9. Chapter 9

_Thanks for all the reviews, I'm trying to get the plot moving on so – please let me know what you think. More soon guys -_

**Part 9**

Sara was sat on the table in the middle of the interrogation room, in the silence – just thinking about what had happened between her and Nick. She had lost it with him again this time in front of the team – she couldn't take it anymore. Maybe the two of them been together was a bad idea – maybe it was true – colleagues and lovers just shouldn't mix. Her head was still spinning after the bottle she'd hit and her anger was still very much present she just was not sure who she was angry at; Nick? or Grissom? or the rest of the team? All of them maybe – or maybe it was herself.

She just didn't understand what was going on with her. She ran her hand on the edge of the table and knew exactly what she was trying so hard to forget with the alcohol – the day she'd been in here with that guy and been more than ready to take his life. It was something she'd feared for so long – since she was a child – that she'd ever have something inside that could take a life. Sighing she knew exactly where it had come from, this fear – the night that she'd watched her mother bludgeon her father to death. She was terrified that there was a murder jean that it ran through the family.

Lifting her hands she place her head in them, how could she even begin to make this okay?

She remembered everything that happened that day- she remembered the police storming into her home – pulling her mother from her father…he head was crushed in. So much blood around the place…

She clawed at her head trying to make the child's please die down, banging her fists into her temple but it didn't work. She remembered, huddled into a corner crying out for her mother to get of her father…

**'_mommy, please, mommy stop --- please!"_**

She didn't stop, and Sara knew from that moment he life would be different. The please transformed in her mind for her childlike voice to a deeper males voice –

**'**_**Sara…stop…Sara…get back…!"** _

memories from the day in this very room – what if she didn't stop? If they weren't there to pull her from him? Would she have killed him?

Her beeper cut into all of the questions, and that was what finally told her she couldn't sit here forever – she looked down to see Greg's name flash. She stood from her position and made herself semi presentable. Moving forward she headed for the door – but not before taking one last look at the place where her worst fears became a reality.

Taking off down the halls of the lab, Sara took a left into the locker room heading over to get her vest and clip so that she could get out of this place. Hopefully she'd be given a case that would keep her busy and not have to deal with anyone. "Hey…you okay?"

Sara hared the caring voice of Greg fill the room, "Fine" She told him.

"Need to talk about earlier?"

"Nope"

"You Sure"

"Yeah"

"Okay then… when you do I'm here" Sara just ignored him, she didn't want to talk. "Okay then, well we got a case together…DB in residential. I'll be waiting by the Tahoe"

She just nodded her head.

With a sigh, Greg left.

He was so worried about Sara, just like they all where.

--------

"What the hell do I do? Huh? She won't even talk to me" Nick growled as he drove towards the scene that himself and Catherine were working.

"Give her time" Catherine offered.

"What more time to drink herself stupid?" Nick shot, he was angry – at Sara, at himself for not understanding Sara. At everything -

"She'll come around" The blond offered

"She's going to burn out Cath…she won't open up" He explained, "Everything was great with us, and now it's gone to this" He pushed his hand through his hair.

"Do you, want me to do my bitch kick and get her to open up to you?" Catherine offered with a small smile.

"honestly I don't think it'll help…I've had the argument so many times…"

"Well, I'm here if you need me, if either of you want to talk or anything…"

"Thanks Cath" Nick sighed.

Catherine hated seeing them like this, no matter how soppy it sounded the team was like a family – and when they were hurting it affected them all. Catherine just wanted to help. Sure she and Sara had moments but there was no doubting how much they all meant to each other. "Have you…spoke to Grissom?"

"About Sara?" Nick asked.

Catherine nodded, "Maybe she needs to be given vacation…made to take it" she corrected. Nick sighed; he had no idea what to do.

------

He sat over paper work, trying to process the evidence with Sara on his mind was proving to be a difficult task. As a result he just shuffled the paper in his hands – occasionally looking over the objects that had been collected. There was no way he could just sit here…he at least needed coffee. Standing up and stretching he turned and headed towards the exit. Praying as he went Greg had made the coffee.

Reaching the break room he saw Sara sat with her head in his hands, he stopped a little thinking that maybe he should turn and walk away – the last thing they needed was a domestic when they were on the clock and in the lab but when he saw her, he knew he couldn't leave her. She was shaking slightly as the tears wrecked through her body – she was crying.

"Sar?" All anger towards her melted, as she turned away from him not wanting to be seen like this especially after today - "Sara..." He asked again as he stepped in and walked over to her. He put his hand on her back only to have her stand up abruptly and walk over to the counter.

"No…" She managed. It was so weak that it was painful – she tried to take deep breaths to steady herself but it didn't work.

"What's happened?" He needed to understand – he was actually scared. The only time he'd ever seen her break down was in his arms in privet. "Sara – please talk to me…"

She lent on the counter – and had no idea what to do – "I'm…" She stopped. Then turned to face Nick – "I'm sorry…"

"What about? Sara…what's happened?"

"I can't do this…" she said, "It's too much…"

"Do what?"

"Be CSI"

_**TBC… **_


End file.
